If I Knew Then What I Know Now: Stronglifts 5x5

It's cliché to say, but, man...if only I could combine some of the wisdom I've acquired in my early to mid 30's back to when I was 21 or 22. Those kinds of thoughts are magnified when you're talking about gaining muscle and strength, when an average male peaks in terms of strength gains somewhere between 18 and 22. Maybe some of the pitfalls I've encountered through the years couldn't have been avoided. I'm extremely stubborn, I don't like to ask for help, and I like to figure things out on my own. Over time, I gained more knowledge in this area mostly "by osmosis" I guess: an article here, a tip from a (much stronger) friend there. But eventually, whatever slight progress and gains I was making would stop, and I would plateau.

Finally around this time last year, I gave in (in a way). I googled "how to increase your max bench." I sifted through some things that were mostly garbage, but I also came across several programs and routines that offered step-by-step instructions showing how to get from point A to point B. The reason I decided on 1 particular program (more on that program at some point down the road) was because it was so formulaic. It specified how many times a week you trained chest, how many weeks the program lasted, and calculated the weight of every set based on some predetermined parameters. And what do you know? After 6 weeks (that was the program length), my max bench press increased. So impressed was I that I repeated the whole program again based on my newly established 1 rep max, and, shocker...it worked again. What a novel concept: there might be people on this planet who actually know more about something than me...so, use them!

And so began my love for this formulaic kind of workout approach. These programs may not be for everyone, but I've found they are perfect for me. Because every workout is laid out ahead of time, it takes out the guess work of what exercises you're doing a particular day. I tend to be in and out of the gym much faster now then before because there is less thought involved and less wasted time as a result. You can also do these types of workouts completely on your own because that printout or that app on your phone is your personal trainer or workout buddy. Some people find they do better working out with someone. I enjoy the company every once in a while, but in general I like working out in a quiet empty gym. Maybe that makes me a psychopath, but that's what works for me. The formulaic workout program also appeases the nerdy, math-loving, science-experimenty part of me. Calculate x, follow steps a, b, c, and d, and get result y. And from my experience, the programs I've tried actually give you positive results.

This leads me to Stronglifts 5x5. After increasing my 1 rep max on the bench 15 pounds in like 6 months (after increasing it like 5 pounds in the previous 6 years), I found that my squatting had become pretty stagnant as well. At first I thought about just modifying the bench program that I had been doing for squats, but after a little digging I found Stronglifts. The general ideas behind Stronglifts 5x5 is almost numbingly simple. It focuses on the 5 big compound movements (squatting, bench pressing, bent-over rowing, deadlifting, and overhead pressing). You do 3 workouts a week alternating between squat, bench, and row and squat, overhead press, and deadlift, 5 sets of 5 reps for everything, and the weight for each exercise goes up 5 pounds each workout.

The weights for each exercise start painfully light at the onset of the program, but going up 5 pounds for each exercise makes things heavy in a hurry (especially for squats). I'm 11 weeks in, and my last workout included a 5x5 of what my 1 rep max was prior to beginning Stronglifts. The other great part about Stronglifts is that you record and can track your progress all in 1 handy-dandy app on your phone. If you fail an exercise at a certain weight a certain number of times, there is even programming in the app that drops the weight down automatically.

At this point, I'm not sure how long I will continue it (until I stop seeing gains I guess??). I'm starting to struggle going up in weight on the overheard press. Based on past experience, I know I will be at my 5 rep max on the bench press in a couple of weeks too. The squatting is getting more difficult, but I'm in uncharted territory at this point. But even if I never improve my max on any of the other 4 exercises as a result of this program, I feel like I already accomplished my goal because I was just looking to improve my squat numbers anyway. If this sounds like some unpaid advertising for Stronglifts, well, it kind of is. It's worked for me thus far, and I'm happy with the results. If you're interested in building strength check out the link above or search for Stronglifts 5x5 in your app store.

Back Again

Wow...it's been nearly 4 years since my last post. (I can't believe I have 265 of 'em on here. I'm not nearly interesting enough to have 265 posts.) A lot has changed. I have 3 (THREE!) kids running around at home now. A professional Washington sports franchise won a championship (hockey, but still...). And...well maybe not that much else has changed!

Why the return? In short, I have no friends anymore. No, no! I'm not saying that in a pathetic please-feel-bad-for-me way. And no, I don't actually have zero friends, but you get the idea. That's just sort of what happens. Married, 3 kids, don't get out much...it's not a complaint, it's just life.

Basically, even at the age of 33 I still need somewhere to release my semi-coherent ramblings on sports, fitness, and whatever other stupid thing pops into my head once in a while. I love my wife, but I am too humane to subject her to too much of my nonsense at any one time. My kids are still too young. If I had a dog, I would probably just scream things at it every once in a while. "You can't switch a big out on Steph Curry at the top of the key, Dusty!" (Dusty seems like a good imaginary dog name.)

So, I'm here. We'll see how long this lasts. My last post was 4 days before my middle kid, Jordan was born. Writing mostly nonsensical things that no one ever read (except for me) didn't seem all that important at the time. But I think writing those nonsensical things that no one ever read made me a little bit more sane.

Potomac Drainage Baisin Indigenous Persons: New Season, Same Old Feeling

The PDBIP kicked off the 2014 season with a thud yesterday. Facing the league's worst team from last season, Washington scored 1st but watched Houston score the game's final 17 points. If I go in paragraph form, I would probably drone on and on forever about the dreck that is my boyhead team, but hopefully bullet form will keep this more brief. Some observations from yesterday...

1. You have to let RG3 be RG3 at least a little bit. I'm all for making Griffin more of a pocket passer and protecting him from big hits, but if you don't let him use his legs at least a smidge then you might as well start Kirk Cousins (or anyone else). I didn't have a problem with RG3 dinking and dunking his way down the field, as some people did. It was working, especially when the Texans' corners were giving DeSean Jackson and Pierre Garcon a huge cushion almost every play. But the "fake" read-option hand-offs, the boot legs, and other play action fakes aren't nearly as effective when Griffin never tucks the ball and runs ever. And Griffin got pounded from the pocket all day anyway, so you might as well let him get hit while running down the field, ball in hand once in a while too. (Which leads to my next point...)

2. No one could f***ing block JJ Watt. Watt wreaked havoc in the Washington backfield all afternoon. He pressured and hit Griffin, sacked him, tackled Alfred Morris behind the line of scrimmage a few times, recovered a fumble, and even blocked an extra point attempt for Pete's sake. I shouldn't say no one, because I think the Texans kept Watt clear of tackle Trent Williams. But they smartly kept scheming ways to have him work against the Redskins much weaker right side in Tyler Polumbus and Chris Chester. Jay Gruden continously kept dialing up plays where the blocking scheme called for one of them to block Watt 1-on-1, which ensued in Watt wrecking several plays all by himself.

3. How could Washington's special teams be this bad? I admittedly didn't see every play (or even every box score) from every game yesterday...and we've established that Watt is a beast...but did any other team have an extra point blocked yesterday? Or a punt blocked and returned for a touchdown? I'm pretty sure no one else f***ing did. The PDBIP had maybe the worst special teams I'd ever seen last season. Is it possible they will be worse this year?

4. Turnovers were where the game was lost. If you watch enough football coverage, turnovers (and related terms) are mentioned enough to make you numb to the idea. But if you look at win-loss percentages based on who wins the turnover battle over the years, they are pretty staggering. Watching yesterday's game, it actually felt like Washington was dominating. But there were basically 5 game-deciding plays in my humble opinion that all went in favor or Houston: the 2 Washington fumbles inside the red zone, the p***-poor tackling effort by Bacari Rambo on Houston's 2nd touchdown, the blocked punt for a touchdown, and the blocked point after attempt (it could have been game-altering if any of the 4 other plays mentioned didn't happen at least).

5. Washington is completely irrelevant on a national scale. Aside from the issues stemming from the team name, no one cares about the PDBIP. They got what was in effect the last place Fox broadcast team yesterday to cover the game. There was zero mention of anything Washington-related on my hour long drive into work this morning. And there is basically nothing on yesterday's game aside from Clowney's apparent knee injury on ESPN's NFL homepage. What's the one thing worse than being bad? Irrelevant...and Washington has earned a 1st class ticket into sports irrelevancy as of right now.

Kevin Love To Cleveland; LeBron For Exec Of The Year

Kevin Love is coming to the Cleveland Cavaliers...well, the news can't be made official for another few weeks, but what has been speculated ever since LeBron announced his homecoming looks as if it will become a reality once the 30 day no-trade period of signed draft picks is completed.

Much excite!

 

With Cleveland seemingly winning the draft lottery every year since James skipped town, you had to start wondering whether the Cavs could ever take advantage of their good fortune. No one would argue that Kyrie Irving isn't great (when healthy), but last year's #1 pick, Anthony Bennett, looks to be a bust so far. Andrew Wiggins is full of promise, but by no means is he a can't-miss prospect of any kind. But with no chance of Love staying in Minnesota, the Wolves at least got something back (they will get Bennett, Wiggins, and Cleveland's 1st round pick next year as well, although they presumably won't be drafting from the lottery for the foreseeable future given the offseason they've put together.)

For my money, I think it would have been cool to see the Cavs hold onto Wiggins, and see how he developed under James' tutelage. James will be 30 this year, and if Wiggins developed he could have been a bridge to the future in the same way the Celtics thought Len Bias would be for them 30 years ago (tragically, that wasn't the case, but still...). Also, Wiggins' cheap rookie deal could have given the Cavs even more flexibility to grab additional talent next summer.

But I get it...when you have a chance to pair 2 guys who were both in the top 3 in the league in Player Efficiency Rating, you do it. Plus, if you thought the James-Wade-Bosh trio in Miami was too perimeter-focused, James-Irving-Wiggins might have given you an aneurysm. Love is the natural fit for the talents of James and Irving. If you're talking about pure talent, I would take the Heat's Big 3 of the last 4 seasons. But if you want to talk about how each player complements each other, on paper Cleveland's new Big 3 takes the cake.

And speaking of cake, LeBron has apparently cut that s*** out this summer...possibly more on that later.

Can you imagine Love grabbing every defensive rebound and doling out sweet outlet passes to LeBron and Irving? And then if they need to slow it down, Love trailing for a pull-up trey on the secondary break? What about the pick-and-roll possibilities? Irving and James, James and Love, Irving and Love...

The rest of the roster fills out pretty nicely as well, especially compared to the role players Miami threw out there in year 1 of the Big 3 era (Mike Bibby, Joel Anthony, etc...yikes). Dion Waiters and Tristan Thompson are up to some stuff. Anderson Varejo still does Anderson Varejo things. And Mike Miller can still fill it up off the bench. And all these guys should be more improved/efficient playing alongside better players.

If you're Cleveland, there are 2 things for you to still worry about. 1st, they have nobody that can protect the rim...like, nobody. They could be an outstanding defensive rebounding team, and they will have to be in order to get it done on D. 2nd, Irving and Love are still spring chickens, but you have to worry a little bit about their health. In fact, even though James has played more NBA seasons than Love and Irving combined, they have both missed more regular season games than LeBron has in their respective careers already.

Still, having said all that, this is a formidable group now. And with Paul George's gruesome injury and uncertainty about the Bulls, the Cavs should be the odds-on favorite to advance out of the East without having played a single game together yet. It's only August, but I already can't wait for basketball season.

Fred Durst-ing It

That’s what Matt from “Two Best Friends Play” refers to rolling as…a reference that goes completely over “Super Best Friend” Liam’s head every time. I can’t say exactly how old the “Best Friends” are, but from what I can gather 3 of the 4 members (Matt, Pat, and Woolie) are around my age. Liam is several years younger, and is thus referred to as the baby. Part of the reason that telling someone to just Fred Durst over or around an object in a video game is funny to the 3 elder Friends is the same reason it’s funny to me: because there is an entire generation of Liams (people younger than me, but not that much younger really) that will have no idea what that means.

Rollin', rollin', rollin', rollin'.

Aside from Rage Against The Machine and a select few other artists, rap-rock/rap-metal bands worth a listen back in the day were few and far between. Thank God that the era of such groups was mercifully short. However, it’s possible that the genre was at least partially responsible for the death of the alternative rock movement that I grew up listening to. By the mid-90’s, rap and hip-hop weren’t just quantities for urban black kids. DMX and Jay-Z albums were seen in just about every 13 year old white kids’ zipper-up CD case that I knew as well. Unfortunately, it seemed like every band that started up around that time had a lead singer that thought he could rap as well…those bands would probably have become alternative rock or grunge rock groups otherwise.

Enter Mr. Durst and Limp Bizkit.

One of the great things about satellite radio is listening to stations that have a devoted genre and time period. SiriusXM’s “Lithium” gives you the general goodness of Nirvana, Rage, and Sublime, but it also allows you to reminisce. I’ve heard the Bizkit twice in the past week on Lithium…“Nookie” and “Break Stuff.” Not once since I’ve been a satellite radio subscriber have 2 songs brought on such confusing feelings. As a 13 year old, both songs would have incited mosh pits among my friends and I (even before I really understand what a nookie was). Now, the old man emotions of F***, I can’t believe I ever used to listen to this garbage juice surface as well. (I did it all for the nookie, so you can take that cookie, and stick it up your ass…now that’s some quality writing.)

If it’s not obvious already, Limp Bizkit was never meant to stand the test of time. For many years, I even held on to Durst’s collab effort with Method Man, “N2gether Now,” including it on every mix CD or playlist I created. After a while, I would skip through Durst’s verses to get to Method. Before long, I would just hit the skip button and move on to the next song until finally I stopped including the song on my iPhone completely. So, while Limp Bizkit may forever by emblematic of that poser era where white kids got home from school, jumped out of their mom’s minivan, went upstairs to their room, put on a backwards hat, and started blasting Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water through their Walkman, at least they will have a soft spot in my heart for nostalgia’s sake. And life will just keep Fred Durst-ing along.

NBA Free Agency's Big 3

With no Internet access at my office, doing this exclusively from my smartphone...how's that for dedication?

With NBA free agents now officially allowed to sign with teams, we all know that LeBron James is this year's big kahuna. But much like the summer of 2010, there is a Big 3 of star free agents that could be moving on to new locations, and none of them may end up in the places we would have placed our bets on a few weeks ago.

LeBron James - As LeBron pretty much holds the entire league hostage until he signs somewhere, you could argue that free agency's Big 3 is really a Big 1, as the dominoes will begin to fall once James decides on a destination.

Where he should go - If he's all about contending for a title right now, the Clippers, Bulls, and Rockets are the best choices outside of Miami, but those teams appear to not even be in the running anymore according to what we hear coming out of James' camp. James would still make the Heat the runaway favorite in the the sorry East even with D-Wade's sorry knees, so Miami is probably where he should stay.

Where he will go - When James 1st opted out of his contract with Miami, I listed Cleveland as a longshot, but it seems like they might actually be the front-runner now. LeBron was under immense pressure to win right now after 2010. After 2 titles and 4 Finals appearances in 4 years with the Heat, that pressure doesn't exist anymore. And James doesn't seem to care what people think about him anymore either. Now, it seems he can just follow his heart (if it wasn't for that pressure, he probably never would've left the Cavs in the 1st place), think long-term about his career (Cleveland's other young talent and cap-flexibility make this a no-brainer), and doing what's right by his family (and as someone who has personally had to weigh career decisions against familial desires, I can attest to this).

Carmelo Anthony - Melo isn't the player and, as Jeff Jarrett used to say, doesn't have the stroke that James has, having no rings and not even much postseason success period. Despite Anthony's unparalleled talents as a scorer, I'm still convinced that he needs to be a team's 2nd banana for that team to be championship-level. But it appears several teams are still convinced otherwise.

Where He Should Go - The Knicks can offer him the most money, but they are probably going to be mediocre-to-bad for a year or 2 before they can get their s*** together. The Lakers are an option for Anthony because they can pay him and have the cap flexibility to bring on a couple more pieces right away, but that still probably isn't enough to contend in the loaded West. Even if D-Rose isn't healthy, Chicago seems like the obvious choice for Melo if titles are his number one goal though.

Where He Will Go - By all accounts though, Anthony loves his money, and despite what everyone preaches about winning, it's hard to fault anyone for that. New York can outbid everyone else, and Anthony's wife loves The Big Apple to boot (that darn family thing again). And rather than bashing Melo for taking the money over the possibility of rings, maybe we could praise him a little for being patient and staying the course.

Chris Bosh - Definitely, the most under appreciated of Miami's Big 3, you forget how good Bosh is sometimes...and that out of he, James, and Wade no one had to sacrifice more of and change more of his game to make the Heat work. LeBron's good enough that he makes whatever team he goes to a title contender (or at least a contender for the conference title) on his own. Melo is a dynamic talent and a star, but I think that only certain teams will succeed with him (depending on the roster construction). Bosh's skillset is the missing piece to a lot of puzzles though.

Where He Should Go - Bosh's case might be the most difficult of the 3 in some ways. He reportedly loves Miami, and if LeBron stays put you would think South Beach would be where CB belongs also. But that Houston offer is very very enticing. And that potential Big 3 would be nothing to sneeze at either.

Where He Will Go - Early on in this process, it looked like this was all a bunch of smoke and mirrors, and Miami's Big 3 would all re-up there and recruit some fresh supporting characters to boot. But with each day that passes, the Big Breakup looks more and more likely. And if you're Bosh, you have to like what Houston has to offer: more money, going back to your home state, and playing in a role that better fits your true skillset. I'm not saying Houston's Big 3 could touch Miami's, and Bosh might still be the 3rd wheel between he, James Harden, and Dwight Howard, but at least he could play his traditional role on offense and defense. The pick-and-pop possibilities with Harden are scary. He could also play high-low with Howard while still spacing the floor with his shooting for Dwight to work in the paint. And Bosh would no longer have to bang down low with centers on the defensive end as he's asked to so often in Miami. In a day and age where top flight big men no longer exist, a Howard-Bosh paint duo would be the best combination at the 4 and the 5 in the league.

Too Many Chefs In The Kitchen: Evaluating Bryce Harper's Return

When I was just a little B-Court All-Star Junior, as a shy introverted kid I often preferred getting lost in my own imagination to playing with others. I was also an athlete and obsessed with numbers and statistics. It wasn't enough to pretend I was on an NBA team taking the game-winning shot...all of my sports fantasies had to be tracked. I actually had a notebook that logged everything from my fictitious basketball career's points per game to the card for each Pay Per View wrestling event for my GI Joe action figures.

For the record, Snake Eyes was my all-time leader in World Heavyweight Championship reigns.

Summertime was when I got the most bored and had the least other sports to follow, so baseball became a key cog in this fantasy world (even though I never played organized baseball as a kid). I imagined an entire lineup and batting order, complete with game-by-game box scores. When my made-up franchise made a mid-season trade for an All-Star infielder in exchange for a minor league prospect, it was impossible to choose which star putting up video game numbers to bench...instead, I simply rotated 10 guys through the 9 positions (my fantasy team had a DH, and several players were versatile enough to play multiple positions, of course).

However, as the Nationals are figuring out now, things just aren't as simplistic in real life baseball as they were when I used to play make-believe. This past offseason, Washington took a gamble that they could make it through 1 more season with Ryan Zimmerman at 3rd base. But his shoulder and throwing mechanics are so f***ed that routine throws to 1st are adventures now. With young stud Anthony Rendon primed to take over at 3rd and Adam LaRoche penciled in at 1st base, Zimmerman's only real move is to the outfield. But with Bryce Harper returning to the lineup from a thumb injury, Nats' Manager Matt Williams now has a real dilemma.

Not a clown question, bro.

When healthy, the Nats could very well be the best team in baseball on paper. Their starting rotation may be the best in baseball 1-5. And their lineup is already solid from top to bottom, but even at 21 Harper is probably their most feared and dynamic hitter. His return should provide a jolt and boost up everyone else as well.

But its Williams' job to juggle playing time, positions, batting orders, and egos here. He has already clashed with Harper once, and maybe unnecessarily, this year. (Harper was benched and publicly called out by Williams for failing to run out a ground ball...Harper happened to be nursing a quad injury and was reportedly under the weather at the time.) Now, not even 1 day after being back in the bigs, Harper is chirping about what the lineup should look like and where he should hit.

As it stands, Williams and the Nats have no easy solution. Harper's got to play...that much is easy. Right field belongs to Jason Werth though. Put Harper in left and that puts Zimmerman back at 3rd, Anthony Rendon at 2nd, and Danny Espinosa on the pine. Espinosa always strikes out a ton and is hitting a miserable .217 right now, but that would hurt Washington's defensive infield significantly. Zimmerman's struggles at 3rd are well-documented, and while Rendon can play 2nd, 3rd is his more natural position. LaRoche has arguably been the Nats best hitter this year. He also is one of the best defensive 1st basemen in the league, so moving Zimmerman there seems unlikely at this point.

The Nats could put Harper in center field, a position he has played well and has publicly voiced that he prefers, but that would drop Denard Span out of the lineup. No one is going to argue that Span can out-hit Harper, but that move could hurt in a couple of ways. 1st, Harper plays center adequately, but Span is one of the better defensive center fielders in the league. Also, Span is the 1 player in the Nats' lineup that is truly a leadoff hitter. Others, like Jason Werth, have filled that role in prior seasons, but no one else is a natural fit for that spot like Span is.

Good luck!

If only the Nats could magically move to the American League at the All-Star break, then they could play everyone and rotate guys into that DH spot to give a player a rest while keeping their bats in the lineup. Alas, that seems about as likely as the Wizards not overpaying to keep Trevor Ariza and Marcin Gortat (oops). So, to solve this the Nationals either need to make a trade or simply just play out the messy situation of rotating guys in and out of the lineup based on matchups, who might need a night off, etc. Having too many good players is not the worst problem to have. The odds in any sport are that someone will go down with an injury again sooner than later, and Williams will adjust the lineup accordingly. Until one of those things happen though, the Nationals are faced with a sticky situation as they try for another playoff push.