Tuesday, May 13, 2014

2014 NBA Power Rankings, Playoff Edition (Volume 4): Timberrrr

It's bad enough that no-talent hack Pitbull was on the NBA's playoff theme song last year , but this year's theme is just too much.


Now I have to see his mug 30 times a night with this garbage. Not only is the actual song 1,000 times worse, but Pitbull's stupid midget face is stamped across the screen the whole time. Just...what exactly was ABC/ESPN thinking? Playoffs...playoffs...playoffs...get the f*** outta here, you wannabe piece of s***!

1. Miami Heat (PR=1)...The Spurs actually had a chance to knock Miami off of the top spot last night, but they couldn't complete the sweep. LeBron's 49 and 4th quarter passing pretty much shows why the Heat should still be the favorites despite their obvious shortcomings.

2. San Antonio Spurs (PR=2)...Do you see me worried? Spurs in 5, you guys. Ho, hum, big whoop.

3. Indiana Pacers (PR=6)...Definitely the biggest fluctuator (word or not a word?) in this list. Here's their high point thus far. Inconsistencies, disappearing big men, and fist fights aside, they have won 5 of their last 6 games now. Suddenly, a knock down, drag out Conference Finals with Miami seems within the realm of possibilities again.

4. Oklahoma City Thunder (PR=5)...Hard to differentiate much between them and the Clippers, but I'll give them the nod based on getting home court advantage back (and looking like the better team for most of 3 straight games)...most.

5. Los Angeles Clippers (PR=4)...I would love to see them advance, but they need someone to make a basket once in a while besides CP3 and Griffin. They're still only the West's 3rd best though.

6. Portland Trailblazers (PR=3)...They win the best spot of the 3 losing teams only because they won last night. (See San Antonio Spurs bullet though.)

7. Brooklyn Nets (PR=8)...KG and Pierce are warriors, but it's time for the very loud, very old, very expensive Nets to go away for the summer. Please don't forget to take your parting gifts on the way out. (Spoiler: there are no parting gifts.)

8. Washington Wizards (PR=7)...If losing 2 home playoff games in the manner that they did doesn't spell not ready for this stage yet, I don't know what does. Hopefully, they will be better next year for having this experience.

Doneski
Charlotte Bobcats
Chicago Bulls
Houston Rockets
Atlanta Hawks
Memphis Grizzlies
Golden State Warriors
Toronto Raptors
Dallas Mavericks

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